Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
