I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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