We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
