Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
