So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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