That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
kristin has been a bad kristin
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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