Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
