garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize