drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
