I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize
