these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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