pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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