Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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