That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize