There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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