haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
