It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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