I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize