Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
