I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
