we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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