Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
