you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
