so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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