When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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