This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize