Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
