i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
