it was like his penis was on wheels.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
