My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
