dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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