my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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