:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
