two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
