this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
