i just wanna soil my oats bro
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
