he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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