his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize