Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
