I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
