I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
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