I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
