I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Randomize
