i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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