I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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