I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
