The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
