Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
