is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
