His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
