so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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