More tranny stories later!
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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