Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize
